Friday, September 01, 2006

I went to the animal fair
The birds and the beasts were there

(NOT... disappointingly there were no poultry or rabbits - only bovine, swine and goat offerings)

The big baboon by the light of the moon
was combing his auburn hair....

The monkey sat "kerplunk"
Right down on the elephant's trunk
The elephant sneezed
And fell on his knees....

And that was the end of the monk the monk the monk the monk....
And that was the end of the monk.

First we visited the obscene food booth which included Crispy Creme doughnut chicken sandwiches and deep fried Twinkies dunked in chocolate... I avoided arterial suicide by abstaining (it was still early)

Then I reveled in a banner which bore my initials... unfortunately I discovered that it stood for Turkey Stampede, which was next.

Some turkeys came out of the little door, ran around the track after a food-bearing little red mechanical truck, and basically made pigs of themselves. Young children were warned over the loudspeaker to "Stay behind the red line, or else you will be taken for a female turkey and attacked"... the young hormonal tom turkeys were only 5-6 months old and were over excitable...

Next were my favorite - the little tiny day-old piglets. The HUGE sows looked as if dead... or as if they wished they were... it was hot and those babies were merciless with their suckling. I don't know why I adore them so much, but I have a feeling it must be because of E.B.White's book "Charlotte's Web", of which I had the entire first chapter memorized as a child. The smell will absolutely SLAY you, even if you love pigs. I can't fathom a worse smell... and as I watched some of the young children come up in the line to hold one, I gagged when a tiny piglet actually let loose all over the front of the kid's shirt... must be my age. I can remember begging my Dad to let me have a piglet growing up. Although we really were "out in the country" in Malibu Canyon he told me we "weren't zoned for pigs" so it was useless. Looking back, I don't know whether to be glad or sad.

This is my only grandson Hunter, holding a quiet little piglet. They gave him a runt because the rest were squirming and squiggling uncontrollably, screaming as though their tails were being cut off.

Next was the milking of the cow... and turning your small vial of milk into butter by shaking it. Nice idea, but the kids were disinterested after a few minutes of shaking, and I surepstitiously threw it away several booths later, after showing him that it had indeed transformed into butter...

I survived climbing this slide, and in fact plopping myself down on the platform and sliding down on a burlap bag after my grandson... I was going to ask the lady who was helping us all onto our bags whether or not anyone had ever gotten stuck halfway down, but I was too embarrassed. I made it all the way to the bottom without incident, much to my great relief!

Last but not least, I (on the right) survived an impromptu water battle, involving my sister, my sweetheart, and several of my nieces and nephews visiting from Albania, and other loved ones, as we positively annihilated each other with powerful streams of water jetted out through the cannons onboard our watercrafts... it was a delightfully cool way to end the day.


:P fuzzbox said...

Deep fried Twinkies are Crazee Tastee. It looks like a lot of fun. I love fairs.

Autumn Storm said...

Have tears in my eyes reading that post (yes, I know, not good :-D), but it just looks and sounds like such a wonderfully fun day, mention of the Albanian side had something to do with that too and knowing how much you miss them, when they are so far away.
So nice to see Hunter finally and looking as thoroughly adorable as I imagined he would.
Lovely post!!

Happy Weekend, x

Anonymous said...

Okay, I'm going to try and attempt to leave a comment via the Anon route since Blogger is acting up on my transition to beta.blogger.

Terry, I love the way you are able to tell a picture with photos. I've got the itch now to get thee to a fair and enjoy the wonderful barnyard smells that remind me of the good life in the country. Looks like you guys had a wonderful time. Thanks so much for sharing Terry, especially that very, very rare Terry sighting shot. :-)


mergrl said...

what fun! and what great pictures of Hunter, what a doll he is. Can't believe you didn't try the twinkies, they rock :0) only thing better is funnel cakes for breakfast LOL

Minka said...

I would love to try that slide.
And I would like to tell you that at teh age of 8 I had a pet pig called Moritz. Sometimes I was found sleeping next to it in the abrn. I guess teh smell didnæt bother me them.
Two years a go we had a pig on our farm here. It was motherless and grew up with two puppies, It really came to believe it was a dog to soem extend. It was always runnign after teh horses and trying to get them to move in teh right direction! It was so funny!
I love pigs...and birds ...and penguins...and turtles and....I better quit now!

javajazz said...

hey look,
its Terry!!!
hey what fun!
and such a cutie grandson too!
xo lisa

Ranger Tom said...

Looks like a great time was had by all!

Lindsey said...

I cannot even begin to tell you how much I love fairs and carnivals! I'm glad you guys had so much fun!

Keshi said...

lotsa fun..GREAT Terry!

U look cool :)


Agnes Mitchell said...

LMAO The Animal Fair. How come you remember all of our childhood songs? (Do you realize that today's children will remember "Magical Trevor" and that weird frog thing?)

Anyway, what a hoot your story is. I haven't been to a fair in ages. Love the piggies and they always remind me of Charlotte's Web too. "Wonderful" "Some Pig!" LOL

As for that slide....well, I went down one of those slides at about 4yrs old. The bag weighed more than me and I got airborne. I stopped 1/2 way down because I didn't have enough weight to keep going. Also got a nifty friction burn on my arm and wear that scar quite proudly today. :D

Wonderful, fun story. Thanks for the grin on my face. I feel like a kid again.