Friday, January 12, 2007




When things are beyond my control, I feel flustered. Coming out of court today I wanted to run out the back door (had there been one) and just scream because the feelings of sadness and impotent outrage were overwhelming. The father of my grandson has won a court order to prevent my little 5 year old kiddo from spending the night at my house, instead the father getting the "first right of refusal" to veto it if he so choses. It sounds petty, but to me it is devastating. His selfish control issues have just crushed me. It isn't the end of the world but the evening bath, reading the bedtime stories and sweet good night hugs may now be rare or non-existent. It is all at the whim of an angry, troubled man.

No time out today. I have no serenity left.

16 comments:

Doug said...

Sorry, Terry. There's nothing in the world worse than child custody disputes. Not a thing.

Autumn Storm said...

So sorry, Terry. No words will cut it, so just feel me squeezing your hand and know that I wish I could take away the hurt.

Love you dearly, x

javajazz said...

oh jeez Terry...
i'm so sick of sick people
always being given
the right of way,
when they should just
stay the hell out of the way.
i have heard stories of
such control freaks
and it just makes me
peuk...what probably upsets
him most, is that your
grandson is treated so
very beautifully at your
place and receives the
love and special care
and attention this creep
is unable to give him.
i'm so sorry to hear of this
because you are such a
shining light in his life,
and you can still be,
but just not under those
circumstances, so keep
your focus on the little
sweetie, and let the wind
blow where it may...love
always wins...there is no
contest.
sheesh.
much love,
lisa

Anonymous said...

It Is Often Said: the last place ,where one finds justice , is a courthouse.

Sherri said...

oh Terry.... you poor thing! I would give you a great big hug right now. I can feel your devestation, I don't know what I would do in the same situation. Hang in there, keep up the fight.

Trée said...

Terry, I can't begin to imagine your pain. You are in my thoughts my friend.

tsduff said...

Doug - this is true. Thanks very much for your caring.

Autumn - *squeezes your hand back*... like on the millinium wheel :-D

Lisa - I oft times feel sorry for that tormented, obsessed man - even though I've actually had a restraining order against him in the past. I don't feel too sorry for him at the moment. My little kiddo fills up my heart. What a truth - love always wins. Thanks Lise...

Annon - We will continue to provide a neutral spot in the daylight hours for that beloved little one to play and laugh.

Sherri- Hugs gladly accepted. Thanks for the encouragement - sometimes I feel like I can't keep up the fight - it has been going on for 5 years now, and sometimes feels impossible to keep up.

Trée - Thank you so much.

Autumn Storm said...

like on the Millenium wheel
Yes, just like that. :-D

Terry, your words to Lisa say it all, perfectly, xoxo

sister celtic said...

OH MY DEAR SISTER TERRY... I KNOW THE HEARTBREAK YOUR EXPERIENCING I WILL E-MAIL YOU ASP. I WILL BE PRAYING FOR THE GOOD LORD TO TAKE CHARGE OF THIS AND NOT A PERSON WITH SUCH UGLY INTENTIONS.. SUFFER THE LITTLE CHILDREN AND FORBID THEM NOT TO COME UNTO ME...AMEN! SOMEONE HAD A GIGANIC MILSTONE AROUND HIS NECK..YIKES!

jillie said...

Oh Terry...I am so sorry about this and it's too bad that he can't see how much this is hurting your grandson. I am a firm believer in karma and his day will come.

(((HUGS)))

Crazy Me said...

I'm so sorry to hear this. Hugs to you!

Agnes Mitchell said...

Oh no! How awful to shortchange that child of your love.
Remember karma. That man will reap what he sows in time. His own son will one day understand what he lost and who was responsible.

Maybe start a new tradition of evening phone calls before his bed time.
Maybe spend the night at his mother's once in a while so you don't miss out on bedtime stories.
No doubt that boy will know his grandma's love every time he sees her anyway. Visits are even more special now.

Sending all my love. Aggie

:P fuzzbox said...

I am sorry to hear that. I wish you the best. I know it must be tough but you have fight in you. Take care.

tsduff said...

Autumn - it's Tuesday. A new day. Yay.

Anne - that guy NEEDs a millstone...

Thanks a bunch Jillie-I know that all will be well eventually. It's those little bumps in the road that are tough.

Hi Angela - thanks so much for the kind words and the hug :-)

Aggie - thank you for your encouragement. I think I'll take those suggestions to heart. He is such a sweetie - and even though he is for the most part unaware that anything has changed, I am aware and it hurts. But as you said, we will make the most of the time we have as they are even more special now.

Thanks Fuzzbox - coming from you that means a lot :-)(because I think you are a tough guy with a soft heart) :-)

Jodes said...

I did not have time this am to read this and now I have and I am sorry this happened. What a crock. That is so wrong to keep you away.....I hope he comes to his senses. I would be lost without my kids.

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